Bad Mums’ Club: Laughing When You Really Shouldn’t

It’s funny isn’t it, how one minute you’re a daft student, drinking shots in a bar with sticky floors or sitting at the back of a lecture giggling with friends about some private joke…. and the next minute, you’re a GROWN UP with KIDS.

Let’s ignore the fact that I have no idea how this happens so quickly and focus on one thing: has anyone else mastered the art of keeping a straight face to their kids when they really want to fall about laughing? I haven’t.

I’m supposed to be a mature, responsible adult, but sometimes I end up sniggering away like a student who finds the word ‘flange’ amusing. (True story: one of my Uni mates and I used to see who could say the grossest word. It freaked him out that I often won.)

Just yesterday, my four year old (who likes to make up words and swap letters around – so she might say “Dummy and Maddy” instead of “Mummy and Daddy” just to be silly) blurted out:

“Mucka mucka! Fuckafuckalucka”

I burst out laughing.

“Why are you laughing Mummy?”

“No reason – you’re just being a silly billy. Come on! Let’s go!”

Phew – totally got out of that one.

But it’s not just her accidentally saying rude words that make me laugh. The other night, she was in the bath and splashed so hard, the whole of the bathroom floor got soaked. Mr P was NOT happy. He got the stern parent act down like a boss. Me, on the other hand, I got the giggles and had to leave the room before the four-year-old saw me.

So, come on, any parents with older kids who are reading this – what are your tricks? How do you keep a straight face when you need to?

 

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• This post is part of the Bad Mums’ Club – a series of posts by bloggers on our ‘failings’ as mums. Of course, we know we’re not really bad parents, but sometimes it’s good for the soul to confess a little and share the not-so-perfect side of parenting. If you’re a blogger and have a post like this, link it up below and we’ll come read your post. If you’re not a blogger, you can access all of this month’s Bad Mums’ Club posts below and have a nice little read. Don’t forget to visit MorganaAimee and Katie to read their Bad Mums’ Club posts!



Gorgeous H&M Kidswear And Presents – A Vlog Haul!

Alison-Perry-YouTube

So after I enjoyed doing a vlog last week on what motherhood means to me, I’ve done another one!

I’ve been thinking about doing more video for a while, but my lack of skills and knowledge when it comes to filming and editing has so far put me off. But seeing other bloggers like Kate from Wit Wit Woo,  Charlotte from Write Like No One’s Watching and Kiran from Mummy Says get their vlog on – and doing it so well – has inspired me. So I’m teaching myself how to do it all. Hence why my videos are, hmm, basic for now, to say the least. But I will learn how to do better captions, title sequences, music, editing, voiceovers and the like – just you wait.

This vlog is me wittering on about some gorgeous buys from H&M Kids. And apologies, I do say the words “gorgeous” and “cute” a lot. Which is a bit annoying. But then, the stuff I’m showing you IS SO GORGEOUS AND CUTE. So let me off, yeah?

Please let me know what you think – either by liking the video over on YouTube, commenting here, commenting on YouTube …. and if you have any vlogging tips, please share them with me!

Thinking About Motherhood

Alison Perry

I probably think a bit too much. Do you do that? I find myself reflecting on life, and what I’ve achieved and where I’m going next. I worry about things I’ve done, things I’ve not done, and things I need to do. All of that is fairly normal, I guess.

One of the things I think about most of all is being a mum. Do we spoil our daughter? Are we firm enough with her? Are we too firm? Will I regret working full time, when she goes to school and we have no choice anymore about how much time we spend with her? I worry about her going to school and being bullied. I worry we don’t brush her teeth thoroughly enough and she’ll end up with fillings. I worry she watches too much TV.

But I also think about how lucky we are. I think back to the pre-parenthood days and can’t remember how we filled our days. Yes, we had lovely long lies and sat around in our pyjamas watching T4, but really, what was the point of any of it?

In the last 12 months or so, I’ve come to the conclusion that ALL that really matters is family. (I know, newsflash…) It matters so much more than anything else – having nice clothes, my job, having a tidy house…

I try not to let memories of being a new mum (ugh, tiredness, anxiety, loneliness…) affect how I feel now. I bloody love being a mum now. But it’s been the biggest, steepest learning curve. Continue reading

Children’s Birthday Parties: The Fantasy v The Reality

It was my daughter’s fourth birthday last week (sob! Where is the time going! Etc Etc) and as I was planning her birthday celebrations, it occurred to me that my idea of a dream party for her is somewhat different to the reality she’d be getting.

Obviously, she had a fantastic time (birthday parties are her FAVOURITE thing ever – seriously, she’d go to one every day if she could) but as someone who regularly pins stylish kids’ party images on Pinterest and sighs in delight when I see bloggers sharing their beautifully decorated (and themed) celebrations, I feel the need to confess how I do things in actual real life…

Decorations – the fantasy

Gorgeous paper honeycomb balls and trendy black letter banners spelling out ‘Happy birthday’.

honeycomb balls garland from Oh Happy day

Continue reading

The Family Friendly Features We’re Not Using On Our Kindle Fire HDX

Poor Mr P. Not only is he a blogging widow (his latest TV series he watches while I ignore him blog, of an evening, is The Shield) but for the last nine months, he has been the only member of our family without a tablet to play with.

He bought me an iPad mini for my birthday last December and the four-year-old has all but claimed our first generation iPad as her own (well, she may as well have it. It’s so old, many apps don’t even work on it anymore *shakes fist at Apple’s clever money making scheme*)

But Mr P was tablet-less. Sans tablet.

Which, I’m sure you can imagine, must have been hard for him. I mean, he only had his iPhone 5S, Apple TV and a MacBook Air to play with. Poor wee soul.

But brilliantly, we were recently given a Kindle Fire HDX and I thought it only fair that Mr P have it. And boy, is he like a kid with a new toy. Within minutes of unwrapping it, he had it set up and linked to his Amazon account, downloaded apps like Facebook and Twitter, and was setting up Amazon Prime Instant Video.

Kindle Fire HDX

What he hasn’t been doing is using any of the amazing family friendly features…

He hasn’t used the FreeTime feature which allows parents to curate content that their kids watch and control the areas of the Kindle that each family member can access.
He has watched the F1 on it.

He hasn’t used the feature which allows parents to have the Kindle shut off automatically at a certain time, so that when it’s kids’ bedtime or homework time, they can’t carry on using it.
He has played Fairway Solitaire on it.

He hasn’t allowed the four-year-old to watch many of the kids’ programmes on Amazon Prime Instant Video, including original shows like Annedroids, Tumble Leaf and Creative Galaxy.
He has surfed Buzzfeed on it.

He hasn’t allowed the four-year-old to watch Tangled, Peppa Pig and Toy Story, which are all available to stream on Amazon Prime Instant Video.
He has read the Hunger Games trilogy on it.

So while the four-year-old is not benefitting in any way from our lovely new toy, Mr P is happy. (And ssshh don’t tell him I sneakily watched a schmaltzy Miley Cyrus movie on it the other night.)