Me-time is something I think about a lot. As a working mum, it’s fair to say that my train journey to work (which, by the way, I’m usually standing up for) is my only regular me-time. But it’s something that is so important – and for dads too. It gives us time to reflect and sort through the thoughts from the day. It gives us time to just slow our brain right down and take a moment where we’re not rushing from one thing to the next.
I’ll be honest – I’m rubbish at making myself relax and switch off. Anyone who knows me in real life will tell you that I have my iPhone practically glued to my left hand, I check Facebook, Twitter and Instagram more than is healthy, and if I’m not working, I’m blogging. Oh yes, or doing that other small thing – being a mum!
I try so hard to slow down and switch off. ‘Right,’ I tell myself. ‘I’m going to have a bath and read a book.’ But ten minutes into my bath, my hand reaches for my phone (much to my husband’s horror – what if I drop the phone in the bath?!) and I’m checking what’s happening on Twitter. People say that it’s nice to take a break from technology and that if they ever leave their phone at home, they realise what a nice break it is. Not for me – all I do is break out in a cold sweat.
On evenings where I’m not working on my blog, I get a bit twitchy. ‘What do people do in the evening?’ I wonder, before sitting with my phone-in-hand, scrolling through my Twitter feed all night. It’s like I need to re-educate my brain in just doing nothing.
I think part of it is (yes, this again) mum-guilt. As mums, we’ve trained our brains into thinking we always have to be busy, otherwise we’re somehow failing as mums. Which obviously is utter crap, but that doesn’t stop us from feeling that way.
I’ve decided to do two things in a bid to relax more and give my brain a chance to breath.
1. Exercise more. I say ‘more’, I mean ‘some’. I feel so much better when I exercise – my brain gets some space from the day and I often end up working through a problem at work, or come up with a great idea. So why don’t I do it more often?
2. Go for a spa treatment once a month. For weeks now, I’ve been craving a back massage. There’s a lot of tension built up there, and while the odd back rub from my husband is nice, I think I need a professional to get rid of some knots. So I’ve decided to book myself a regular massage (or facial). To heck with the cost. I deserve it.
Last week, I was invited to have a mini pamper session by a PR promoting Disney On Ice. I know, it was like she knew, like it was some kind of Disney magic, or something. At the fab Aveda Salon in London, I had a manicure and pedicure. Granted, it wasn’t the much-needed massage, but just taking that time out made such a difference. Ginny, the lovely PR, chatted to me as I sat being pampered, telling me about the new Disney On Ice show that’s just gone on sale (It’s called Dare to Dream and is themed around the Disney Princesses – how apt, given my treatment that day), and I felt like I was a million miles away from normal life.
It reaffirmed in my head how I need to look after myself more so, starting this week, I’m going to put my two-point-plan into place. I may still tweet from the bath, but that’s OK, isn’t it?
I’m reading a book at the moment about doing nothing. It’s eye-opening. I’m exactly the same. Ironically, it’s actually led to the formulation of an idea for a new work project… if I get the time to put it into action. Not sure that was the point of it, but I absolutely hear you. It’s hard being able to switch off and do nothing when you’re not in the habit of doing it.
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I was JUST about to tweet you a link to this, Molly, saying your post last week inspired me to write this. What is the book? Great that it’s inspired you!
It has taken me a long time to learn how to steal some time to myself but I’m getting much better at it and I think that I’m a better Mummy for it too! Oh and it’s perfectly normal to tweet in the bath *cough*
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Yes, totally normal! (I bet more people than you think do it…)
Mum-Me-Time – love it! All this modern technology has a lot to answer for when it comes to us literally never switching off. I’m on a similar mission to you – do some exercise (I did two sessions of the 30 day shred last week, was meant to do 7, but it’s a start… this week we won’t talk about) and spa treatments – off to a better start with those… two trips in two months, for some reason this is an easier habit to keep up!
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Two work outs are better than none! I might make a deal with myself that I can only book a spa treatment at the end of a month if I’ve exercised regularly.
I have a bath with my iPad and BlackBerry (and a glass of wine). Since becoming a mother I feel like I always must be doing something and if, extremely rarely, I find myself not doing anything, then I feel like I need to justify that (mainly to myself!).Raminta
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It’s crazy isn’t it? We should all just allow ourselves to do nothing sometimes.
I’m awful for always checking my phone. Smartphones have a lot to answer for! As well as working on my digital projects in the evening, I get up incredibly early to work on them then too. I could really do with a lesson in how to switch off and do nothing!
I’m definitely getting better at me time too-a gorge beauty salon is minutes from where we live and they open late so I love treating myself (always have) and enjoy blow dry’s when I can. We work hard and deserve a break…always being on is hard though and I have been known to tweet/email in the bath too. I think it’s hard if you are freelance like I am as you have to chase the work and be expected to work at crazy times. I’ve got better at prioritising and not feeling I need to superwoman all the time. It’s liberating.