Thoughts On Bed-Wetting, Embarrassment and Confidence

This post brought to you by DryNites®. The content and opinions expressed below are that of Not Another Mummy Blog.


There are certain things, when it comes to being a parent, that we find a bit embarrassing or uncomfortable, even though we know we shouldn’t. I think it’s that fear of being judged by other parents.

I clearly remember feeling a bit embarrassed about the fact that my two-year-old was still using a dummy for naps and bedtime. Isn’t that daft? If my daughter needed a nap while we were out and about, and I handed her a dummy, I’d say something to the people we were with like “Oh! The dummy fairy will be coming soon!” as if to explain it away and justify the decision to give it to her.

Similarly, there have been times recently when we have been at a friend or relative’s house until quite late in the day – in that kind of circumstance, we often take the four-year-old’s PJs with us and get her changed into them before we leave, so that if she falls asleep in the car, we can transfer get straight into bed. On those times, we’ve put DryNites® Pyjama Pants on her, and I can feel myself prickle with slight embarrassment in case anyone is judging me for having a four-year-old who wets the bed. I mean, how crazy is that? Especially when it’s important that we help our kids feel confident about everything in life, whether it’s riding a scooter, writing their name or wetting the bed.

The four-year-old been totally toilet-trained (I always think that makes kids sound a bit like a puppy) for over two years and is at the stage now where she will happily take herself off to the bathroom, go to the loo, wipe, flush, wash and dry her hands – all without any help. She’s a little star! But come night time, she can’t get through a whole night without wetting the bed. I’m not sure if it’s because she goes into such a deep sleep, she doesn’t notice that she needs to wee (we regularly cut her finger and toenails while she’s sleeping – that’s how deep a sleeper she is!) or whether her brain just isn’t ready to tell her bladder how to hold it in, while she’s asleep. DSC_9701


I’m not concerned – after all, the NHS say it’s totally normal for under 5s to wet the bed and it affects almost 600,000 children in the UK every year – and thankfully she is really happy to pop her DryNites Pyjama Pants on each night before bed. She even takes them off every morning when she wakes up, pops them in a plastic bag and puts on a pair of pants.  I love that DryNites pyjama pants offer discreet, age-appropriate protection for her, and help her feel as grown-up at night as she does during the day. What’s more, the DryNites® Confident Kids 24/7 campaign provides parents with helpful tools and advice to boost their child’s confidence and overcome challenges like bedwetting​.

Do you have little ones who wet the bed? Find out more and request a free sample from the DryNites® website.

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  1. July 11, 2015 / 9:09 am

    Yes I think heavy sleeping can effect it definitely. My youngest seemed to stop just as she hit 5 and the drynites were a life (and mattress) saver up until that point.

    • Alison Perry
      July 11, 2015 / 9:34 am

      Definitely! And speaking of mattresses, we have the DryNites mattress covers too which are excellent.

  2. Liz Hamblyn
    July 11, 2015 / 9:30 am

    I have two children. A son who was dry at nights by the time he was 3 and half and a daughter who still wet her bed at the age of 10. My worse nightmare was she would still be wet at night and getting her period, but thankfully there was a 6 month gap. She was under the care of a pediatrician for a number of years. His verdict was she was a deep sleepe and not waking up early in the morning at the time when she needed to go to the batheroom. She possibly didn’t produce the enzyme that consindrated urine down at night. She was totally self managing and went off to school camps and sleep-overs, with no problems whatsoever. I was a bit concerned when she went to boarding school at 12 that she may start wetting her bed again, but no she was dry. All I say in the scheme of things don’t worry. Wait for the conversation you have with your 14 year old daughter about how she wants to go on the pill because of that randy 15 year old boyfriend….

    • Alison Perry
      July 11, 2015 / 9:34 am

      Oh blimey! I am in denial that that will EVER happen 😉

      • Liz Hamblyn
        July 11, 2015 / 9:51 am

        Don’t be, because it will be a conversation that will happen before you ever realise. It frightens me that I hear of girls having their first sexual experiences at 13 years old. I went to the boyfriend’s boarding school and had a little chat with him. Told him if he wanted to sleep with my daughter, here were the rules: firstly, he was going to the doctor’s with her, if she was going on the pill he was going to be there as well. The doctorexplained the use of various types contraceptionfor them to use: secondly, if I found any mention of his and my daughter’s physical relationship on any form of social media he was dead: thirdly in my worse nightmare, it would be twins, but that was Ok, we would have the boy and his parents would take the girl. Neeless to say he is still here two years later.

  3. July 11, 2015 / 9:42 am

    A is 4.5 years and we’ve had some success in the past with her going through the night dry but it’s too random and 50% of the time she doesn’t make it through and then we all have a crappy night’s sleep because she wakes up wet and distressed. So I decided sod it, we use DryNites and in time, we’ll try again. I’ve decided not to worry about it!

  4. Nic
    July 11, 2015 / 12:00 pm

    My son was only dry at night from 8½ years old and he still has a few accidents. He saw incontinence nurses, doctors, school nurse, had desmopressin (synthesised version of the hormone that concentrates your wee at night) and a bed alarm that scared the living daylights out of all of us! In the end an impending school trip with a night away was what made him get out of pull ups. We worried so much but in the end he did it when he was ready. My daughter decided one day aged 4 that she wanted to wear pants in bed and just did it. No accidents at all since! Kids are all different and they do things in their own sweet time. And besides, on this one, no one else really needs to know unless your child is sleeping at their house for the night so I don’t think it’s too much worth stressing over. Back in the day parents were much more eager to get their kids out of nappies because they had to wash them so I think the pressure is off from that point of view these days.

  5. July 11, 2015 / 10:55 pm

    We have the exact same thing with LP but we’re not worried. I’ve heard often that there’s a chemical in their brain that stops them weeing in the night so we’re patiently waiting for that to kick in! x

  6. July 13, 2015 / 9:06 am

    Wilf is also still in dry nights (he’s 3.5) and I think he will be for a little while yet too. Having spoken to other mums I realise it’s totally normal but it’s not talked about that much is it? I was the same with the dummy thing, like anyone even cared but me! It’s silly the things we think we or our children will be judged on x

  7. July 13, 2015 / 6:03 pm

    We have been trying out these too. My girl loved the one with the cats on. Hopefully she will crack it this summer! x

  8. July 13, 2015 / 8:15 pm

    We haven’t had too much of a problem with bed wetting from our first two but we’re in the throes of ‘toilet training’ our third child and I think these might be a bit of a life-saver!! Thanks x

  9. July 15, 2015 / 4:51 pm

    It’s so sad that we feel so much pressure about what other people think isn’t it? Especially as they really do do everything in their own time – just like us!

  10. July 28, 2015 / 12:37 am

    My little Beanie is having the same problem. She has been absolutely fine during the day for the past couple of years, but during the night, she is never dry. She is about to turn 5, but her paediatrician told her that until they are 6, it is not considered an issue. Nappies at night it is!

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