10 things every parent will tweet
1. The early morning tweet:
It’s 6.05am. My kids are fast asleep. Why am I awake?!
2. The clock change tweet:
THANK YOU GMT for making our day an hour longer. Currently trying to convince 2yo he is sleepy and wants to go to bed #fatchance
3. The 3am feeding mum tweet:
Anyone else awake? My timeline is so quiet…
4. The wine o’clock tweet:
It’s been a day of tantrums, rain and Peppa Pig. I’ve bloomin’ earned my 7pm wine tonight.
5. The weirded out by technology tweet:
OK so my 18 month old can unlock my iPhone and knows my passcode. I’m officially scared.
6. The date night tweet:
Heels on. Lippy on. Top that isn’t covered in baby puree on. We’re going to the pub! Like real grown ups do! #datenight #givemeallthewine
7. The hungover tweet:
Oh GOD. My head is pounding. And I have to take my 2-year-old to a birthday party today. SAVE ME.
8. The childrens’ TV tweet:
Kids’ TV has changed so much since we were young. So is this Mr Tumble dude meant to be a bit like Timmy Mallett?
9. The bloody knackered tweet:
Going to need a LOT of coffee after being woken up every hour last night. Do they make caffeine drips? *makes mental note to invent them*
10. The lie in tweet:
I’m having a lie in with a cup of tea. This is the dreamiest thing since they invented Dream Topping in the 1970s.
And the tweet no parent should ever send…
LOOK! A photo of my son’s first ever poo in the potty!
No one wants to see. Honestly. I’m sure you’re very proud of your son – seriously, potty training is super stressful and when you crack it, you feel like a SUPER HERO. You can take on the world and achieve anything. But showing visual evidence to everyone you know is just TMI.
Which tweets do you see all the time from fellow parents?