Starting today, I’m going to refer to Instagram as Boastagram. Seriously, haven’t you noticed that most people use the social photo app for boasting about their life?
“Ooh, look at this amazing cake I just ate”
“Yep, I have nothing better to do than sit and drink this latte that has a love heart drawn in the foam”
“Old shoes… but they’re standing on a station platform, which means I’m going somewhere exciting”
“I’m drinking a posh, overpriced cocktail!”
“I just cooked THIS. Delia, eat your heart out”
I’ll admit it, I’m probably one of the worst offenders. This is just a selection of my recent Boastagram photos…
See? To anyone who doesn’t know me, my life looks like a whirl of fizz, face cream and France. If I gave a fair representation of my life on Instagram, I’d actually post photos of…
My two year old thrashing around on the supermarket floor because I won’t let her run around with a tub of Flora that I have no intention of buying.
The scummy, dirty McDonalds that my husband and I bought from the Drive-Thru last weekend after toddler fell asleep on a car journey.
The yoghurt stains on my black sofa, and the squished-in peas and fish finger crumbs.
The grumpy man that I was squashed up against for 20 minutes on my commute home from work tonight.
My size 10 Topshop parka that I still wear, despite the fact it won’t zip up over my tummy and boobs.
The piles of clean washing sitting in my spare bedroom that I have no intention of tidying away.
On second thoughts, perhaps the world isn’t ready to see all of that…
What would your Instagram profile show if it truly reflected your life?